I don't update this very often. Truth be told, I wish I had a blog about running or baking, but I can put some of that in a regular family blog post right? I've been feeling a little disconnected from a lot of people in my life lately. Maybe because life can be so very busy and overwhelming. I'm working 2 overnight shifts a week at a job that I love but it can be tiring. I can really struggle to find a good balance between checking off what needs to get done and what I really want to be doing. I love my life so, so much and I feel incredibly blessed, but some days it can be tough to deal with the stresses of life. Man do I ever need heaven's help to get me through some of those days!
I feel like this winter my seasonal depression hit me pretty hard. I really struggle with January-March here in Colorado. We do get plenty of sunshine, but also lots of snowy cold days. Some people love the snow but I only like it the month of December because it feels Christmas-y. All winter I long for summer and fall to come back. Someday I dream of having a winter home next to a beach! Good news is we have a family trip to Florida coming up in a couple of weeks. Can't wait!!
Last year I spent the winter months training for the Boston Marathon and that was the plan for this year... until my back started aching in December and hasn't stopped. Back pain sucks. I totally empathize with anyone who's experiencing it. I feel like I'm 80 years old when I try to stand up after sitting down to tie my shoes. It's crazy! So that hasn't helped my winter blues one bit. All I want to do is go for a long run but my body won't let me right now. As one of my running friends recently told me, "running makes my soul feel alive". I couldn't agree more. So I do what I can for the time being to keep my body strong and to try and stay positive.
I know lots of people who are struggling with physical trials right now that prevent them from doing what they love. I really appreciate the prayers and kind words from my friends and family. Their kindness has helped me to learn an important lesson. Focusing less on my own trials and instead trying to help encourage others can take my mind off of those things that would otherwise bring me down. Prayer is especially powerful and I know I need it everyday. I've been thinking lately that I can do better with my prayers and that when I pray I can be much more specific in asking for heaven's help for those that I love. My husband, children, friends and family and even those who I might hear about and not know very well. What a blessing it is to know that God truly does hear and answer our heartfelt prayers.
I loved reading and thinking about the words by Elder Uceda from the February Ensign. He said, "When we offer a mighty prayer, we have the attention of the most powerful, merciful, and loving being in the universe. We spend a moment in the heavens, especially when we are going through difficult times". I love the comfort and peace I feel through prayer. Even if my problems or struggles, or those of my loved ones don't go away, there is strength that we can receive to endure. I need to offer more mighty prayers.
I had a recent fall out with someone I used to be really close to. It's been hard to deal with. I go back and forth between feeling upset about it and then feeling guilty. Relationships can definitely be tricky and can take a lot of work. It can be really hard to work through hurt feelings and words that sting and you can't take them back. Forgive and forget. Some things just take time. And patience. And love.
My kids teach me so much about forgiveness. My 2 rambunctious little boys are so sweet half the time and then the other half they're out of control. Thank goodness for school and basketball which give them an opportunity to be with friends and get some of their energy out. I've always thought teachers are the most patient people ever! I need to pray for more patience because lately I feel like I'm raising my voice more but they still don't hear me. I'm glad they love me despite my days when I'm lacking patience. Like when my 7 year old insists on wearing shorts to school when it's snowing or digging his favorite sweatpants out of the dirty clothes and sneaking them on in the back row of the car on the way to school. Someday I'll look back on that and think it was so hilarious! Or the sneaking of iPads and iPhones when homework, chores or music practice needs to be done. It's a constant battle!
Man I love my littles to pieces and I especially treasure my mother/daughter relationship. Shay is like a little sponge and I'm trying to do better to speak well of myself and to show her that it's important to be kind not only to others but to ourselves. My kids are amazing and I want them to always believe that! There's nothing better than a hug from one of them to brighten my day. I love their thoughtful questions, insights and laughter. They also teach me tons about happiness.
My older boys are enduring middle school and high school. I worry about them all the time because I know how tough those years can be. Dylan has his license now and he's out with his friends a lot more. I kinda miss driving him around and talking to him in the car. He's such a great kid but I know he can be hard on himself. He excels at everything he does and is one of the kindest teenagers I know. He's more quiet and he gets that from me. It can be a tough mental game when you're surrounded by really outspoken people but that's just not how you are. But isn't it so great that our personalities are all a little different from each other. And I think we're drawn to those that bring out the best in us. I'm glad that he has such a great circle of friends.
Both he and Christian are wishing and hoping for that next growth spurt so that they can keep up with their sport. Oh the struggles of having short parents, lol! Isaiah Thomas is only 5'9" and look at how successful he's been! They are both super passionate about basketball and I sure love watching them play. Christian is doing so well with his academics and piano. He's quite confident and has a great sense of humor. He's always quick to smile and laugh and I love that about him!
I'm grateful for my husband who works so hard to provide a nice living for us and who is such a great dad to our kids. He keeps us laughing and is such a good example of hard work, service and kindness. He also finally went to the eye doctor and learned how to put contacts in his eyes which is a really big deal!!
That's the latest!
That's the latest!
Hugs,
Nat
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